WORK Consultancy Inc ° Jan 02

13 Signs of High Emotional Intelligence

The original post is written by Justin Bariso. Check out the full article here.

What does emotional intelligence look like, as manifested in everyday life?

Justin Bariso

  • You think about feelings – Emotional intelligence begins with what is called self- and social awareness, the ability to recognize emotions (and their impact) in both yourself and others.
  • You pause – The pause is as simple as taking a moment to stop and think before you speak or act. (Easy in theory, difficult in practice.) In other words, pausing helps you refrain from making a permanent decision based on a temporary emotion.
  • You strive to control your thoughts – By striving to control your thoughts, you resist becoming a slave to your emotions, allowing yourself to live in a way that’s in harmony with your goals and values.
  • You benefit from criticism – When you receive negative feedback, you keep your emotions in check and ask yourself: How can this make me better?
  • You show authenticity – Authenticity doesn’t mean sharing everything about yourself, to everyone, all of the time. It does mean saying what you mean, meaning what you say, and sticking to your values and principles above all else.
  • You demonstrate empathy – The ability to show empathy, which includes understanding others’ thoughts and feelings, helps you connect with others. Instead of judging or labelling others, you work hard to see things through their eyes.
  • You praise others – This all begins when you focus on the good in others. Then, by sharing specifically what you appreciate, you inspire them to be the best version of themselves.
  • You give helpful feedback – Negative feedback has great potential to hurt the feelings of others. Realizing this, you reframe criticism as constructive feedback, so the recipient sees it as helpful instead of harmful.
  • You apologise – Emotional intelligence helps you realize that apologizing doesn’t always mean you’re wrong. It does mean valuing your relationship more than your ego.
  • You forgive and forget – When you forgive and forget, you prevent others from holding your emotions hostage–allowing you to move forward.
  • You keep your commitments – It’s common nowadays for people to break an agreement or commitment when they feel like it. Of course, bailing on an evening of Netflix with a friend will cause less harm than breaking a promise to your child or missing a major business deadline. But when you make a habit of keeping your word–in things big and small–you develop a strong reputation for reliability and trustworthiness.
  • You help others – Most people don’t really care where you graduated from, or even about your previous accomplishments. But what about the hours you’re willing to take out of your schedule to listen or help out? Your readiness to get down in the trenches and work alongside them? Actions like these build trust and inspire others to follow your lead when it counts.
  • You protect yourself from emotional sabotage – You realize that emotional intelligence also has a dark side–such as when individuals attempt to manipulate others’ emotions to promote a personal agenda or for some other selfish cause. And that’s why you continue to sharpen your own emotional intelligence–to protect yourself when they do.
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